


Chickens Don't Dance

by fuzzybluemonkeys



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Dancing, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-10
Updated: 2014-07-10
Packaged: 2018-02-08 05:56:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1929246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuzzybluemonkeys/pseuds/fuzzybluemonkeys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rodney teaches Teyla to waltz and it's just as absurd as you're thinking.</p><p>Prompt Quote: "The truest expression of a people is in its dances and its music. Bodies never lie." -- Agnes De Mille </p><p>(Originally written for <a href="http://choc-fic.livejournal.com">The Characters of Color Love Fest</a> back in wow, 2007.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chickens Don't Dance

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimers:  
> 1\. Most of what I know about waltzing I learned from the internets.  
> 2\. It is possible that there exists a universe wherein I own the Stargate franchise. This is not that universe.

"Right. So. Waltzes are typically in 3/4 time. That means there are three beats per measure and the quarter note gets the beat."  
  
Rodney presses a button on his laptop and music begins to play. He starts counting in time with the music, " _One_ -Two-Three, _One_ -Two-Three, _One_ -Two-Three--" he motions for her to count along with him.  
  
Teyla takes a brief moment to beg the Ancestors for patience and begins to count, " _One_ -Two-Three, _One_ -Two-Three, _One_ -Two-Three…"  
  
This goes on for quite some time-- the two of them counting in unison, and just when Teyla is about to give in to the urge to tell Rodney that yes, Athosians do have music, and she is perfectly capable of finding the rhythm on her own, the song slows and comes to an end.  
  
"Now, waltzes usually progress from the root of a chord…"  
  
As she listens to Rodney ramble on, she knows from years of experience that waiting for him to pause in speaking before she attempts to stem the tide of words is a pointless exercise. Because Rodney McKay does not pause. He simply keeps speaking until he has run out of things to say, and then he speaks some more.  
  
"McKay," she says, gently but firmly.  
  
It does not stop the flow of words.  
  
"Rodney!" This time she is forceful, and, as she has learned from watching Sheppard, slightly dangerous.  
  
Rodney finally subsides and looks at her. Looks her in the eye for the first time since they began this little exercise.  
  
As always, she forces the anger and frustration inwards. Her people respond better to calm serenity, and the same is true of the people of Earth.  
  
"Just," she takes a deep breath to center herself, "let it be music."  
  
"Well yes, of course, but--"  
  
"Please."  
  
Rodney's mouth opens and closes a few times as his eyes travel all the way around the training room before returning to her face.  
  
"Are you sure you wouldn't rather just beat me with sticks?" He sounds almost hopeful at the idea, and Teyla feels the corners of her lips quirking upwards.  
  
"No. I wish to learn to waltz."  
  
"Right. Okay. But why me? Why now? What _for_?"  
  
She stops him before he can work his way into another chattering frenzy, "Sheppard said he did not know how."  
  
"Yes, yes, and then I insulted him, and he insulted me-- it's what we do, really and--"  
  
"And I asked if you would teach me and you agreed to do so."  
  
"I did?"  
  
"You did."  
  
"Because I really don't--"  
  
Teyla raises an eyebrow at him.  
  
"Yes. Fine. Okay. Basically, there's a box, you see, an imaginary square, and ah, the four corners of the square, except it's not a square, it's a quadrangle, really, because there's no way to ensure that all your steps will be of equal length- believe me, I've tried--"  
  
Teyla finds herself once again asking the ancestors for patience, a fairly common occurrence when spending time with Rodney, but he has trailed off in the midst of her prayers and is looking rather pitiful at this point, so she gives him an encouraging smile and gently prompts, "Perhaps you could show me?"  
  
She gestures to the center of the room where usually she does a different sort of dance: sticks and sweat and the exhilaration of disarming a Marine twice her size who obviously hasn't thought much of her until this moment, where, bruised and beaten, he must concede that she is more dangerous than she looks.  
  
Rodney, arrogant though he is, has no doubt that she could beat him senseless, and in fact, looks like he's bracing for a blow right now. But he nods and clicks play on his laptop once more.  
  
He awkwardly positions her left hand on his shoulder, and gently rests his right hand just above her hip. He takes her right hand in his left and holds them up, hands clasped together. Teyla decides it would be best not to mention how sweaty his palm is against hers.  
  
He starts counting again, " _One_ -Two-Three, _One_ -Two-Three…" always emphasizing the 'one' despite the beats being of equal length. She soon learns why as he changes the 'one' to, " _Step_ -Two-Three, _Step_ -Two-Three, _Step_ -Two-Three…"  
  
She steps back as he steps forward, then to the side, then forward, then back to where they began. It is nowhere near as difficult as the patterns and movements of fighting, and so she easily picks up the repetitive little dance whose imaginary quadrangle can move, it turns out, and take them across the floor.  
  
Rodney settles in and allows her to lead their movements, and she finally manages to get him to stop counting with a well-placed glare. It is only later, when they stop because Rodney is getting short of breath, that she realizes the music has long since ended, and they've been dancing to the sound of their own footfalls.

. . .

  
Teyla sips from her water bottle while Rodney alternates between gulping noisily from his and taking enormous bites out of one of his ever-present Power Bars.  
  
"So," and for once he has managed to finish chewing before speaking, for which she is grateful, "Why did you want to learn a useless Earthling dance, anyway? I mean there can't be much call for waltzing in the Pegasus Galaxy--"  
  
"I have been invited to Lt. Eads and Dr. Dourdan's wedding--"  
  
"Dr. Dourdan is getting married?"  
  
"Yes. I was there when he told you. You said, 'Yes, yes, congratulations' and then went back to your work--"  
  
"He's marrying Lt. Eads?"  
  
"Yes. I believe you are invited as well. And although I am not sure if the General will give me permission to attend, I wish to be prepared. Sheppard said that waltzing would be appropriate for a wedding--"  
  
"Actually, at the last wedding I went to, it was more Macarena and chicken dancing and that sort of step-from-side-to-side-while-awkwardly-clutching-your-partner-for-dear-life that everyone's been doing since grade 6, except for me of course, because I never had anybody to dance with, and me attempting to dance in public is a bad idea anyway, and what kind of idiot is Sheppard telling you that a modern-day wedding would include a waltz?"

  
"...'Chicken dancing'?"


End file.
